Someone has told you they ’ re self-harming . Now what ?
Authors : Penelope Hasking , Professor of Psychology , Curtin University , and Stephen P . Lewis , Professor of Psychology , University of Guelph
This article was published in The Conversation in November 2023 : https :// theconversation . com / someone-has-told-you-theyre-self-harming-now-what-213983
Global Health Asia-Pacific is republishing it under Creative Commons licence .
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About one in six adolescents report having self-injured at some point in the past .
For many people , self-harm can be a di�cult behaviour to understand . It also comes with a lot of stigma .
This can make talking about it di�cult as people who self-harm often anticipate negative responses and judgement .
But if someone tells you they�re self-harming , how you respond is critical to their health and wellbeing .
What is self-harm ? Why do people do it ? The term self-harm could mean someone ’ s intentional damage to their body as a way of coping or an attempt to end their life . But we think these are very different behaviours .
So we prefer the term self-in�ury to describe the range of non-suicidal behaviours people use mostly to cope with di�cult feelings ( such as intense distress or anxiety ) and thinking styles ( for instance , self-criticism ).
Self-in�ury is common . About one in six
adolescents report having self-injured at some point in the past .
But no two people�s experiences are alike . And people self-injure for many reasons other than to cope . This includes to punish themselves or to feel something when feeling emotionally numb .
So , if someone tells you they self-in�ure , it is critical to avoid assuming why they do it .
Telling someone is a big step �iven its associated stigma , many people who selfin�ure do not tell anyone . When they disclose , it is usually to friends or family .
When disclosing to friends or family , someone values the quality of the relationship , disclosing to people they trust . They may not be seeking tangible aid ( for instance , professional support ). Instead , they are looking for social support , understanding , and a safe space to talk about their experiences .
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